Friday, May 4, 2012

It stinks...

It'd been a stressful day to begin with...
Long Sleepless night,
Early morning,
Melted ice cream cone in the middle of my already disastrously messy kitchen,
Lyon slammed Fenix's hand in the front door, Now her pinkie finger is swollen and ouchefied,
We got Bear to school,
Lyon to school,
We went to the doctor,
We went to have parent/teacher conference with Lyon's teacher, and then finally, finally we got to relax for a minute at the park...
We caught our breath.
The day went on,
Come dinner time,
Fenix poops her pants,
Lyon crashes on his scooter "breaking" his foot again,
He screamed at me that it was all my fault, that I am the worst mom ever, and that he wants a new mom,
and then he refused to eat his dinner,
We finally settle down for a movie,
Then bedtime rolls around,
By some miracle I managed to get all three kids ready for bed,
Lyon and Bear tucked in and kissed good night,
Fenix skips happily out their door heading to her room before letting out a blood curdling scream and bolting back into The boys room,
What's the matter?
She's seen a spider,
How I managed to deduce that from her screams I'm not even sure.
I tried to get her to show me where it was but she was to horrified to tell.
Bear went to investigate,
I came up behind him as he gasped that he saw it,
"is it big?"
I asked him.
"no, but I lost it."
Nothing worse than a lost spider, no matter how big it is...
We stood there for a moment contemplating our options and cringing with creepy crawly heeby jeebies,
Then Bear points,
He sees the spider,
I follow his gaze, and there to my complete and utter consternation I see crawling out of Fenix's door a spider that no woman would ever, EVER refer to as small.
I watched in shock as it made its way out of the shadows and into the light cast by the hall light.
I wore no shoes,
The vacuum was upstairs,
All I had to battle this nightmare was a half box of wet wipes, mercilessly placed between me and IT.
I armed myself,
Crept forward,
And got a nice close view of what we thought was a spider.
It wasn't much better, but the threat was no where near as paralyzing.
A stink bug.
Relieved and knowing it wouldn't put up much of a fight I used my weapon (wipes) to grab it and pulverize it.
My voice is gone, my throat is sore, I'm tired, and I've more than met my quota of stress for today.
But whatever, we keep calm and carry on, right ladies...